Tuesday, July 23, 2019

A New Identity When You Retire


We’ve recently received e-mails from retirees asking about how to manage their loss of identity now that they have retired. One retiree painfully acknowledged that she had become her business card, and wondered who she was now? A retired CEO summed it up: ”Too late I discovered my title was fleeting and it was never about me. It was about the chair I was sitting in. Once I retired, the chair maintained its identity. I did not.”    

This “identity thing” didn’t happen overnight. Remember when you were a child and people asked you: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” It was the first time we were forced to consider a new identity beyond being “a kid.” Many of us said doctor, astronaut, race car driver, teacher, or however we identified with.

When we became adults, people would outright ask, “What do you do?” Society was making us identity ourselves and it was usually by our profession or job title. This was particularly painful when people were downsized and in transition. We personally substituted “what do you do” with  “what keeps you busy?”  The question allowed people to save face. At the time we thought wouldn’t it be great if people started conversations by asking, “So what gives you joy?” but we knew that wouldn’t happen . The reality is we like to assign a label to someone because it helps us position them within our framework and it is a quicker way to start a conversation. 

From an anthropological standpoint, being a member of a tribe offers a strong sense of identity. Modern tribes can be a company, a business, clubs, religious denominations, a hobby group etc. The person who belongs to the tribe has a built-in identity.

When retirement arrives, identity can go and the tribe with it.  Loss can cause anxiety, even pain, especially if you have no new interests or passions to pursue. And pain knows no gender. 

This is the opportunity for people to rewire by re-routing their energy into new activities, paid or not, that are emotionally fulfilling and allow for the creation of a new identity.  It might not be the same…but it can still be good, maybe even better but you need to be aware of what motivates or drives you before you set out on this new journey.

In our research we discovered 85 reasons, we call Drivers, of  WHY PEOPLE WORK BEYOND MONEY? A sampling of the 85  range from Having Accomplishments to Belonging to Problem Solving, Being Valued, Wielding Power, to Having Recognition. 

Take the time to identify your Drivers; they can aid you in discovering new ideas and activities to pursue that can help you create a new identity in your next act. 

Above all try to make it enjoyable so you look forward to waking every morning with your new identity and the new tribe that goes with it.

Sunday, July 7, 2019

Lee Iacocca was a REWIREE!

Lee Iacocca died last week at 94 years old. Fortune Magazine featured him on their cover in June, 1996 with the headline, “How I Flunked Retirement.” It was the first time we ever heard someone say they had flunked retirement.  He became one of our inspirations for writing our book, Don’t Retire, REWIRE!

Mr. Iacocca stated, “You plan everything in life, and then the roof caves in on you because you haven’t done enough thinking about who you are and what you should do with the rest of your life.” He also believed that Americans spent more time planning a two-week vacation than they did their future.

When we read the article, we started asking ourselves, “How can a man who had been CEO of Chrysler and Ford, someone who headed up the United States Bi-Centennial Commission and was once talked about as a contender for President of the United States flunk retirement?”  He had money, position, power and prominence. It made no sense to us at the time.

Once we began exploring the concept of flunking retirement,  we discovered it was a huge concern for many people.  Iacocca just happened to be the first person who articulated it.  Because of his status as one of the Top 100 Business Executives of the 20thCentury, people were interested in what he had to say about business. This article showed another side of Iacocca. As several pre and post retirees told us, “When I read the article, I was so happy to know I wasn’t alone. Even a man of his status had fears about retirement and the future.”

A lot has changed since 1996.  Americans are still focused on financial planning for retirement, and now the retirement coach has entered the scene to assist pre and post retirees to better self-actualize their futures.  Life planning and financial planning should always go hand in hand. Many retirees have had a much better life because Lee Iacocca let them know that planning was a key ingredient for a fulfilled future.

After the article appeared in 1996, Lee Iacocca went on to write books, start new businesses, launch takeovers and consult with start-up companies.  He enjoyed his family and being a grandparent.  He never stopped learning or doing the things that he found rewarding. He REWIRED many times and inspired others to do the same.

Thank you, Lee Iacocca.  You were a great leader on so many levels.